0:00
Welcome back, it's your girl, Stefanie here, once again, with some thoughts from my journal, and some vulnerability. So I want to talk about my fear of being judged. And I'm assuming if you're listening to this, that this is gonna resonate in some way, whether you have this exact same fear or a fear of being judged as something else.
0:26
So my fear of being judged is of not being good enough. But it's deeper than that. It's something underneath the fear of not being good enough. And the word that comes up for me, is being judged as inferior. So as I bring you on this little mini journey with me, I'm going to break apart the word inferior. And I did this in my journal a couple of days, a couple of days ago, because I felt like this is something that always comes up, I need to break it apart, I needed to look at it from a different perspective and from a different angle, instead of always assuming that when that fear comes up, that it has some sort of validity.
1:02
So I literally went to the dictionary, well, I googled the word right and found a dictionary, and really unpacked the word inferior, a little bit more deeply for myself, so I can understand it. If we were to break the word apart, like I went down to find the Latin root of the word and the Latin root of the word means low, and then the ending of the word, the IOR, means to compare. And I really had to pause and think about this, this idea that comparison is built into the word inferior.
1:38
So one of the definitions is that it's caused by an actual or supposed inferiority, or another one is being lower in rank, or status or ability or quality. And I really let myself unpack this in a bigger way. But I found that I came back to this word comparison. That's, when we break the word apart, it's that ending. That's what that means.
2:05
And when we think about the word comparison, it's a subjective thing. It depends on the person's perspective. So we really can't have a judgment of someone being inferior in an objective way, because it relies on comparison. And comparison is always subjective, because it depends on the person's perspective. And I know for me, my perspectives are not always accurate. I have past programming that is dictating what those perspectives are. And when I think about it in this way, and I really big pictures zoom out on this, is that that fear of being judged as inferior. Number one is going to happen. I can't get away from that. It's inevitable. And the reason is, because there are so many perspectives in the world, so many different ways to look at things and to compare things. And there are an infinite number.
3:06
And when I thought of it that way, there are going to be people who do judge me as not good enough or inferior as they're listening to this podcast. And doing this work. This breaking it apart, almost brought me to a place of peace and acceptance. Around being judged as that.
3:25
I feel like this is the beginning of owning that word in a very empowering way instead of feeling afraid of that future event of being judged as inferior or not good enough. And then I went farther, I asked myself, What if my quote unquote, inferior qualities are actually my strengths, as well? And what if it just depends on the perspective that is looking at it. So depending on the person who is observing who I am, meet, being authentic, there is going to be judgments of she's not good enough. I don't like her. And holy shit, I really do like her, I want to spend some more time with her, I find her thoughts and opinions to be valuable, or whatever it is.
4:15
I'm the same in the situation. And there's two very different perspectives on who I am as a person. And if this is going to happen, no matter what, why, why even worry about it, I, I am so over worrying about it. And that feels really good. It feels really good to own it. to really stand in my power and say, yes, people are going to judge me as not being good enough and as being inferior. And I'm okay with that. Because I know it's not objective. It's a subjective opinion that cannot be separated from different people's perspectives and biases too.
4:56
So the conclusion that I came to is that owning the very thing that I'm afraid of, is so fucking empowering. So if you have a word or a fear of being judged as a certain thing, and if you found this inspiring. Unpack it, see where it leads, you look at it from a different perspective and see if you can own it in a way that feels so fucking good, that you give yourself permission to be you. Because that's what the world needs.
5:29
The world doesn't need me pretending to be someone I'm not to please others around me. The world needs me. The world needs you to be you. Not someone else. Not trying to fit in, not trying to belong because we're afraid of being alone. But being you so that as you do, people can actually connect with the real you. And that's genuine. That's real connection. That's what I want.
5:59
That's it for today. Thank you for listening to this minisode and remember, you've got this!